Leaving Dad in Charge for the Weekend: Can you handle it?

Okay, Moms.  You have an opportunity to go away for the weekend with a girlfriend.  Your husband has graciously supported you, and agreed to take care of the kids alone for the weekend.  Do you:

A)  Write him a hundred notes, explaining detail-for-detail every little nuance of the kids’ schedule, from how to pack the backpacks for school, to the exact right setting on the toaster for their waffles.

B)  Let go, and let him do things his way.  The routine will be a bit different, but the kids will survive.

C)  Skip the trip.  They’ll never survive without you.

I chose option A and a half.  Meaning, I chose to let go and let him do things his way…but I still wrote about 25 detailed notes.  I couldn’t help myself.

daddy weekendI feel very lucky to be married to a guy who is not only a great Dad, but who is also very capable and confident with the kids.  But he goes off to work each day, while I manage things at home, so naturally he doesn’t know all of the ins and outs of our day.  For example, after school I always empty the kids backpacks immediately, sign any papers and return them to the backpacks for the next day. When I make my daughter’s lunch, I always open her snack bar and then seal it with a piece of folded tape, creating a pull tab for her (because she has a difficult time opening it on her own).

I’m one of those Moms who has to fight her inner inclination to be a helicopter parent.  God forbid my daughter should open her backpack at school and her daily folder isn’t in there, right?  And what if my baby boy can’t find his pacifier for his nap because my organized system for keeping one in each room (practically) fell apart in my absence?

Good grief, right?  So I did it.  I left only a few notes, and trusted my husband to figure the rest out on his own.  An opportunity for Mom to leave for the weekend is filled with benefits for everyone in the household.

  1. It’s a wonderful opportunity for a Stay-at-Home Mom to experience the emotion of missing her children.  I mean honestly…how could I ever miss their cute little faces and long to hug them if I am never away from them?  Sounds funny, but it’s that old saying..absence makes the heart grow fonder.  A break can be great for your relationship with the kids.
  2. The above is also true for your relationship with your husband.  A couple of days apart can be very healthy.  A little alone time feels good.  And the reunion is always sweet.
  3. Leaving the kids alone with Dad enables them to bond on their own terms.  It’s great for Daddy to have the opportunity to call the shots and care for the kids in his own way. My husband takes the kids out for donuts, lets them stay up a little later, and plays hide and seek with them.  For those few days, he is their sole source for comfort, play, security and fun.  Sometimes Mommy needs to get out of the way and let Daddy enjoy his kids on a deeper level.
  4. And lastly…what we’re all thinking…Mommy leaving for a couple of days gives Daddy the opportunity to see EXACTLY WHAT GOES ON WHEN HE ISN’T HOME!  While I was away, my husband was solely responsible for the laundry, meals, bedtimes, carting kids around to run errands, getting them ready for school…etc etc. And he did a great job.

[bctt tweet=”Reasons to leave your kids alone with Daddy for the weekend #momlife “]

So don’t be afraid to leave, Moms.  I know some Dads are better equipped than others to fly solo with the children, but I bet if you give him a chance, he’ll surprise you.  And he’ll make some very special memories with the kids.  It’s worth coming home to a messy house or to some undone details…  Let go, and let him give you the gift of a couple of days away.

NicoleGive yourself a break and let your kids stay at home for the weekend with their dad. Can you handle it? https://dailymomtivity.com

January 27, 2016
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  • Reply Kimberly @ Stuffed Suitcase

    I definitely pick b). 🙂 I’ve left my hubby alone with our kids for a lot longer than a weekend (twice has been for 2+ weeks) and it’s always great. He parents differently but is just as capable as I am to raise our children. I think every mom needs to feel ok about leaving home and having some me time, it’s beneficial for everyone in a healthy family dynamic!

    January 31, 2016 at 6:46 pm
    • Reply Nicole

      Good for you! Many of us need CONTROL over the household details, but you are wise to let go, and let Daddy! You’re so right about your spouse being just as capable, even if his ways are different. Thank you for reading!

      January 31, 2016 at 8:50 pm
  • Reply Faye

    I have to admit that I am torn between A and C…. Likely A and a half, like you. Depends on how long the trip would be. But I do agree that it is so important to know and treat your husband as an equal parent – because they are!

    March 22, 2016 at 8:48 am
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